Daycare

Urg. Daycare. So, my maternity leave is over and I now have to think about how I am going to supplement that income. If I substitute teach, I only need to work 3 days a month. Big deal, right? Well not right. I told myself it would be no big deal. I talked to a lady that has an in-home daycare. She is great with the other kids and she has experience with twins. We went to her place for a look-see and things are great. They know most of the kids and the daycare provider from 'Strong Start'. Familiarity is not an issue. I don't even think the twins would have an issue with anything. It is all me. I am not ready. I have no idea how other moms do it, the thought of actually having my kids cared for by someone other than family makes me want to cry.

Now, I never even contemplated the baby. I always assumed that the baby would go to my mother's for the day and the twins would go to daycare in order to relieve some of the burden on my mother. I had everything worked out, until the evening after the look-see. Then, I melted. These are my children, mine. I want to keep them in a nice, safe bubble that revolves around the love of their family.

Lets face it though. I have had it great. If I have ever needed to do something like an appointment, or when I went back to work after the twins, my mother was always there for me. I saw what this did to her, though. She was exhausted and deprived of her own freedom. She has already raised her kids and shouldn't be doing it again. Besides, the twins were 14 months old when I went back to work, not 10 months old. Yes, 4 months makes a huge difference at this age. 4 months makes a huge difference at pretty much every stage of development.

So, I bawled all my fears to my ever understanding and compassionate husband and he told me not to worry, he would figure it out. I could head back to work when I was ready. I have now begun the process of weaning the baby. I guess, I will have to wait and see when I am ready. I am going to go through with the daycare. I do need a place where the twins can go for a morning or afternoon if I need to do something. But, the baby is coming with me!